Flapxuckfoss Satwitjat Fagnurlzen is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, strong skunk.

Flapxuckfoss Satwitjat Fagnurlzen created the Large Magellanic Cloud three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flapxuckfoss Satwitjat Fagnurlzen, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Flapxuckfoss Satwitjat Fagnurlzen, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Flapxuckfoss Satwitjat Fagnurlzen's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Flapxuckfoss Satwitjat Fagnurlzen's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Flapxuckfoss Satwitjat Fagnurlzen.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Never paint your chest mauve.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never feed bread to swans while wearing purple scarves.