Lopbinsogweejenyarlcubfot is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, unthinking wolf.

Lopbinsogweejenyarlcubfot created the planet Mars eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Lopbinsogweejenyarlcubfot, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Lopbinsogweejenyarlcubfot, she will manifest in front of you.

Lopbinsogweejenyarlcubfot's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Lopbinsogweejenyarlcubfot's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about cell theory.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Do not cook food in pots.