Bagsinhim is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, caring coyote.

Bagsinhim created an electron seven million years ago.

If you believe in Bagsinhim, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Bagsinhim, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Bagsinhim's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Bagsinhim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Retreat if nine otters approach from the west.

3. Never wear yellow rings.

4. You must pray to Bagsinhim five times a day.

5. Erect a large lead sculpture of Bagsinhim on top of all buildings.