Midruttgon is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, deceitful fairy.

Midruttgon created a charm quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Midruttgon, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Midruttgon, he will manifest in front of you.

Midruttgon's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Midruttgon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

4. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

5. Always take life seriously.