Spagcarweg is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, amazing aardvark.

Spagcarweg created a charm quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Spagcarweg, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Spagcarweg, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Spagcarweg's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Spagcarweg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Erect three zinc sculptures of Spagcarweg on top of important buildings.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Never go into cyan rooms.