Gubtofgamduss Tenbudrat is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, intelligent tortoise.

Gubtofgamduss Tenbudrat created the world five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gubtofgamduss Tenbudrat, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Gubtofgamduss Tenbudrat, she will destroy your home planet.

Gubtofgamduss Tenbudrat's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Gubtofgamduss Tenbudrat's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never think about comets.