Taghon is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, weak squid.

Taghon created the solar system seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Taghon, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Taghon, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Taghon's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Taghon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. You must love Taghon.

3. Always make sure there are no manatees in a room before entering it.

4. Tortoises are not to be trusted.

5. Never think about stars.