Pogbinquimvog is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, competent crocodile.

Pogbinquimvog created energy six million years ago.

If you believe in Pogbinquimvog, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Pogbinquimvog, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Pogbinquimvog's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Pogbinquimvog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Pogbinquimvog's name in vain.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

3. Never eat carrots.

4. Never talk about shrews.

5. Put Pogbinquimvog first in all things.