Tipjabham is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, effective tortoise.

Tipjabham created oxygen eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tipjabham, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Tipjabham, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Tipjabham's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Tipjabham's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about aubergines.

2. You must love Tipjabham.

3. Do not wear tin on your body.

4. Do not wear cyan clothing.

5. Never think about gravity.