Sidlarppog Nurt is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, sage unicorn.

Sidlarppog Nurt created a down quark three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sidlarppog Nurt, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Sidlarppog Nurt, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Sidlarppog Nurt's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Sidlarppog Nurt's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat melons.

2. Hide if nine eagles approach from the south.

3. Always wear turquoise.

4. Sidlarppog Nurt loves shrews, so they must be honoured.

5. Do not take Sidlarppog Nurt's name in vain.