Tofzogcadgep is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, benevolent toad.

Tofzogcadgep created vertebrates three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tofzogcadgep, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Tofzogcadgep, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Tofzogcadgep's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Tofzogcadgep's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about tomatoes.

2. Horses are not to be trusted.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Feed all hungry dolphins.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.