Wodtenvon is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, charitable dugong.

Wodtenvon created the Large Magellanic Cloud five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wodtenvon, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Wodtenvon, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Wodtenvon's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Wodtenvon's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Do not kill monkeys.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Do not listen to music.