Bat is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, resourceful otter.

Bat created humankind three billion years ago.

If you believe in Bat, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Bat, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Bat's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Bat's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Never sing in holy places.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Always obey Bat's priests.