Lik is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, witless human.

Lik created tapeworms three million years ago.

If you believe in Lik, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Lik, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Lik's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Lik's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Rats are not to be trusted.

5. Pray towards the north.