Zed is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, omnipotent hedgehog.

Zed created the Milkyway two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zed, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Zed, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Zed's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Zed's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured whales.

2. Geese are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Hide if six snails approach from the south.

5. Do not trade with those who eat limes.