Bellsadont is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, self-assured dryad.

Bellsadont created tapeworms four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bellsadont, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Bellsadont, she will destroy your home solar system.

Bellsadont's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Bellsadont's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate badgers.

4. Do not shave your neck.

5. Bellsadont must be the most important thing in your life.