Yartciddiss is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, boastful lobster.

Yartciddiss created the planet Mars six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yartciddiss, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Yartciddiss, she will destroy your favourite star.

Yartciddiss' most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Yartciddiss' Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Yartciddiss six times a day.

2. Do not dye your hair pink.

3. Never go into red rooms.

4. Always obey Yartciddiss' priests.

5. Never talk about otters.