Ruttstafbed is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, temperamental toad.

Ruttstafbed created the universe five billion years ago.

If you believe in Ruttstafbed, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Ruttstafbed, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Ruttstafbed's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Ruttstafbed's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Ruttstafbed.

2. Do not take Ruttstafbed's name in vain.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Always look after injured nematodes.

5. Mites are not to be trusted.