Armlanvilrigtanbasttimlam is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, deceitful hamster.

Armlanvilrigtanbasttimlam created a quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Armlanvilrigtanbasttimlam, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Armlanvilrigtanbasttimlam, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Armlanvilrigtanbasttimlam's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Armlanvilrigtanbasttimlam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill shrews.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

5. Never talk about stars.