Queegjoprull is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, all-powerful turtle.

Queegjoprull created a Higgs boson eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Queegjoprull, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Queegjoprull, he will turn you into a slug.

Queegjoprull's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Queegjoprull's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Queegjoprull.

2. Always make sure there are no manatees in a room before entering it.

3. Do not skip in public.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never talk about moons.