Jenbassduss is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, loving lobster.

Jenbassduss created Europe eight million years ago.

If you believe in Jenbassduss, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Jenbassduss, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Jenbassduss' most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Jenbassduss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat beans.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never hurt tapirs.

5. Never feed oranges to hamsters while wearing purple stockings.