Nellciphot Kan Gebquartnarl is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, unthoughtful wren.

Nellciphot Kan Gebquartnarl created a quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Nellciphot Kan Gebquartnarl, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Nellciphot Kan Gebquartnarl, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Nellciphot Kan Gebquartnarl's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Nellciphot Kan Gebquartnarl's Holy Commandments

1. Do not sing in public.

2. Erect a large silver sculpture of Nellciphot Kan Gebquartnarl on top of all buildings.

3. You must love Nellciphot Kan Gebquartnarl.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.