Stragfudsat Satmilfig is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, effective squirrel.

Stragfudsat Satmilfig created silver five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Stragfudsat Satmilfig, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Stragfudsat Satmilfig, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Stragfudsat Satmilfig's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Stragfudsat Satmilfig's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Hide if four great tits approach from the east.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always help porpoises in need.

5. Always help dogs.