Vinkik is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, thoughtless chicken.

Vinkik created a quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vinkik, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Vinkik, she will turn you into a snail.

Vinkik's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Vinkik's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.