Siswonvagbell is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, witless wasp.

Siswonvagbell created an atom three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Siswonvagbell, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Siswonvagbell, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Siswonvagbell's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Siswonvagbell's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Siswonvagbell.

2. Always help sick capybaras.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never write about amino acids.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.