Nellminkim is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, self-assured armadillo.

Nellminkim created an atom five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nellminkim, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Nellminkim, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Nellminkim's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Nellminkim's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never feed aubergines to snails while wearing purple shirts.

5. You must pray to Nellminkim five times a day.