Yampagkom is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, kind troll.

Yampagkom created water three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yampagkom, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Yampagkom, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Yampagkom's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Yampagkom's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Yampagkom's priests.

2. Hide if three geese approach from the east.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always treat foxes with great respect.

5. Do not listen to music.