Hantikveg is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, moody badger.

Hantikveg created dark matter eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Hantikveg, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Hantikveg, he will be very sad.

Hantikveg's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Hantikveg's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about cell theory.

2. Worship no other gods but Hantikveg.

3. Do not speak about bread.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.