Nurlrotpannursadhat is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, narcissistic horse.

Nurlrotpannursadhat created a Higgs boson nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nurlrotpannursadhat, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Nurlrotpannursadhat, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Nurlrotpannursadhat's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Nurlrotpannursadhat's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Worship no other gods but Nurlrotpannursadhat.

3. Nurlrotpannursadhat must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never wear scarves.

5. Never eat bark.