Ratyardag is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, loving capybara.

Ratyardag created the planet Earth three billion years ago.

If you believe in Ratyardag, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Ratyardag, he will turn you into a mole.

Ratyardag's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Ratyardag's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate snakes.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Ratyardag.

3. Erect a large lead sculpture of Ratyardag on top of all buildings.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Ratyardag.

5. Pray towards the west.