Jiggadcut is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, grumpy crab.

Jiggadcut created an atom nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jiggadcut, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Jiggadcut, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Jiggadcut's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Jiggadcut's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if five mice approach from the north.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Do not trade with those who eat turnips.

5. Worship no other gods but Jiggadcut.