Dagnarlfagnill is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, generous goose.

Dagnarlfagnill created a bottom quark two billion years ago.

If you believe in Dagnarlfagnill, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dagnarlfagnill, he will throw large rocks at you.

Dagnarlfagnill's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Dagnarlfagnill's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Always help otters in need.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

5. Dagnarlfagnill loves tortoises, so they must be honoured.