Futjadsat is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, ruthless beaver.

Futjadsat created the universe four billion years ago.

If you believe in Futjadsat, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Futjadsat, he will curse you with boils.

Futjadsat's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Futjadsat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Do not speak about coconuts.

4. Put Futjadsat first in all things.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.