Camkonwan is a god.

She takes the form of a small, contented scorpion.

Camkonwan created Asia seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Camkonwan, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Camkonwan, she will curse you with boils.

Camkonwan's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Camkonwan's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if eight ants approach from the east.

2. Never jump in holy places.

3. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Camkonwan on top of all buildings.

4. Feed all hungry goats.

5. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.