Vinqueegvog is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, annoying salamander.

Vinqueegvog created the planet Venus two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vinqueegvog, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Vinqueegvog, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Vinqueegvog's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Vinqueegvog's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Vinqueegvog.

2. Always obey Vinqueegvog's priests.

3. Run away if four birds approach from the east.

4. Never eat nuts.

5. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.