Xuckxuckquamfly is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, unjust otter.

Xuckxuckquamfly created the Whirlpool Galaxy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Xuckxuckquamfly, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Xuckxuckquamfly, he will attempt to scare you with hail.

Xuckxuckquamfly's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Xuckxuckquamfly's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into fawn rooms.

2. Gulls are not to be trusted.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Do not shave your neck.