Karfittim is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, self-confident jackal.

Karfittim created tapeworms three million years ago.

If you believe in Karfittim, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Karfittim, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Karfittim's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Karfittim's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Retreat if eight cats approach from the east.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Karfittim.

5. Always make sure there are no squirrels in a room before entering it.