Yimponbonk is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, generous frog.

Yimponbonk created a Higgs boson nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Yimponbonk, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Yimponbonk, he will not care at all.

Yimponbonk's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Yimponbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat turtles with great respect.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Hide from gray monkeys for they are unholy.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Never look at asteroids.