Cubpanjantarp Dissjinrag is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, caring faun.

Cubpanjantarp Dissjinrag created dark energy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cubpanjantarp Dissjinrag, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Cubpanjantarp Dissjinrag, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Cubpanjantarp Dissjinrag's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Cubpanjantarp Dissjinrag's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Run away if three tortoises approach from the north.

4. Pray towards the east.

5. Do not dye your hair violet.