Zodrowjen is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, slow hedgehog.

Zodrowjen created the planet Earth two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zodrowjen, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Zodrowjen, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Zodrowjen's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Zodrowjen's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Always look after injured sheep.

4. Do not kill doves.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Zodrowjen.