Kiktagquart is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, dishonourable swallow.

Kiktagquart created oxygen three billion years ago.

If you believe in Kiktagquart, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Kiktagquart, it will turn you into a worm.

Kiktagquart's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Kiktagquart's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Never paint your face gray.

5. Never talk about fire.