Fubfemquat is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, compassionate dugong.

Fubfemquat created a Higgs boson nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fubfemquat, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Fubfemquat, he will turn you into a slug.

Fubfemquat's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Fubfemquat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your hands.

2. Always obey Fubfemquat's priests.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always treat sharks with great respect.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.