Nutnigren is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, ruthless lizard.

Nutnigren created the Milkyway four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nutnigren, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Nutnigren, he will torture you forever.

Nutnigren's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Nutnigren's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about moons.

2. Always help squirrels.

3. Never talk about shrews.

4. Goats are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Erect six lead sculptures of Nutnigren on top of important buildings.