Bifqueeghot is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, ruthless walrus.

Bifqueeghot created humankind twelve years ago.

If you believe in Bifqueeghot, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Bifqueeghot, she will ignore you.

Bifqueeghot's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Bifqueeghot's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no grasshopers in a room before entering it.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Do not kill monkeys.