Ruttbetquart is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, charitable parrot.

Ruttbetquart created the Cigar Galaxy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ruttbetquart, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Ruttbetquart, he will turn you into a mole.

Ruttbetquart's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Ruttbetquart's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at nebulae.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Never go into green rooms.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never feed corn to bats while wearing black kilts.