Gudnutciss Xinrigcar is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, tiresome snake.

Gudnutciss Xinrigcar created dark matter nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gudnutciss Xinrigcar, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Gudnutciss Xinrigcar, he will turn you into a goat.

Gudnutciss Xinrigcar's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Gudnutciss Xinrigcar's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Gudnutciss Xinrigcar three times a day.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Erect a large iron sculpture of Gudnutciss Xinrigcar on top of all buildings.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate turtles.