Himvedmob Fentigneg is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, tiresome pig.

Himvedmob Fentigneg created bats five million years ago.

If you believe in Himvedmob Fentigneg, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Himvedmob Fentigneg, he will turn you into a mouse.

Himvedmob Fentigneg's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Himvedmob Fentigneg's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Hide if five turtles approach from the east.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Always help snails.