Timwaptetti is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, clever meerkat.

Timwaptetti created parasitic wasps three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Timwaptetti, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Timwaptetti, it will be very unhappy.

Timwaptetti's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Timwaptetti's Holy Commandments

1. Erect eight tin sculptures of Timwaptetti on top of important buildings.

2. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Frogs are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Always obey Timwaptetti's priests.

5. Do not stand on grass.