Cabflatmutrig is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, amazing mongoose.

Cabflatmutrig created the Tadpole Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cabflatmutrig, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Cabflatmutrig, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Cabflatmutrig's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Cabflatmutrig's Holy Commandments

1. Always help turtles in need.

2. Do not drink water in white rooms.

3. Never feed grapes to eagles while wearing magenta shirts.

4. Do not trade with those who eat aubergines.

5. Never talk about fire.