Cadlamrutt Quafbudnak is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, passionate raven.

Cadlamrutt Quafbudnak created an electron seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cadlamrutt Quafbudnak, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Cadlamrutt Quafbudnak, she will turn you into a puffin.

Cadlamrutt Quafbudnak's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Cadlamrutt Quafbudnak's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Nematodes are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never wear turquoise ear rings.

5. Always pray immersed in water.